Tiffanie Paige

i hate bees. actually, i am just really scared of them. i’m not a fan of any insect (except for lightning bugs or fireflies may be the more proper term), but i especially am not a fan of anything with a stinger sticking out its butt. but the bees make honey so that’s cool.  a bee got into my room and i actually just rescued my computer (and my hair products) that it has been holding hostage. the problem has yet to be solved, i.e. the bee is still alive i think and taking over my room, but at least i got a few things out so i can work on my paper and so my hair doesn’t look terrible.  anyways, so here is the breaking news story: i have found three bees in the house since it’s been nice out. the first one died a lonely death by drowning in the kitchen sink drain the second one meandered into my room and i killed it when it landed on the floor by stepping on it over and over and squishing it. victory #2. so when i saw the bee in my room today, i thought for certain i could take it. after all, the bees score = 0, me = 2 (although the sink had more to do with the first victory than i did, but hey, it’s a team effort). so, i had just gotten back from a run and was heading to the shower when i saw him. he was buzzing around and then landed on the cord of my light switch, hanging in mid air - totally impossible to kill at this angle. ok, so the best thing to do is jump in the shower and deal with StingerButt when i get out. this may be a bit much for the blog, but the details add to the hilarity of my…stupidity. so out of the shower, and not dressed yet, i see the bee land on my chair (the big soft cushy type). this is my chance to take him out. i grabbed a shoe and slammed it down on top of him, only it wasn’t so much of a slam because the chair was soft. i pushed and squooshed and slowly raised the shoe to see if he had died. nope. still kicking. so i press harder. still alive. i grabbed a tshirt to maybe get ahold of it and throw it away or…something. but then i get scared that it would sting me through the shirt. what to do, what to do…. i chickened out, completely. i was about to make a run for it since i had already made him mad and couldn’t kill him. since i had some research to do, i kicked a book across the floor so it would fall downstairs. with my free hand, i grabbed some clothes that luckily i had already laid out, and then….i ran! what a wuss! anyways, i figured he had some time to cool off and hopefully had forgotten that his attempted murderer had returned, so i recently ventured up and grabbed my computer and some hair stuff. i’m waiting until my roommate gets home before i try attack number two. keep ya posted…. and maybe pray a bit in the meantime that the bee dies of natural causes before i have to return up there